Dear Non-Blogger; Why Being A Blogger Isn’t Always As It Seems…

Dear non-blogger;

I wanted to take a little time out to explain a few things…

Being a blogger isn’t always as it seems.

Oh, but your life is so glamorous you say?

But it’s not. It is, and it isn’t. Sometimes you put us bloggers on pedestals, commenting on pictures with your friends using the hashtag #GOALS but what sometimes we forget to explain is that what we show you, is 10% of our lives, and not always ‘real’ life.

We feel anxious too, we cry, we feel sad, we eat our body weight in Ben & Jerry’s and gossip with our best friends, we leave the house with no makeup, we own more comfy clothes & pyjamas than we care to admit, we think that people are judging us, we hate walking into a room of crowded people alone, we are more like you than you’ll ever realise. 

We portray our lives how we want you to see them. I store Instagram-worthy pictures so when I’m sitting at home in my sweatpants doing my tax return with greasy hair, I can upload pictures of some yummy brunch, or the latest YSL bag in Selfridges, because well, not everyday can be spent living the ‘highlights’, our everyday lives are the behind the scenes that we don’t share with you.

I just wanted to let you know, our lives aren’t perfect. We’re just like you, maybe more so than sometimes you realise.

We also feel insecure – maybe more so than your average girl as yeah, we know how to pose for a picture in our latest outfit post, but we also have to narrow 200 down to the final 15 we share with you. We all have insecurities and scrutinising pictures of ourselves on a daily basis can knock our confidence. Why do we look four months pregnant in that picture, how did we let our hair get that many split ends, WHAT is my face doing?! And so it goes on…

What you don’t see is that latest selfie posted took 30 outtakes before we finally settled on one we liked – even then we may have had a little cry, deleted it and started over again. What you don’t see is the suitcase of clothes we drag around the streets of London so we can shoot four outfits in one morning to save time and money. What you don’t see is us changing in between shoots in public toilets, restaurants, shop changing rooms or even on the street.

I think what I’m trying to say is, don’t compare your behind the scenes to our show reels, because we edit and select what we show you, when we show you. Sometimes our lives are glamorous and we get to visit amazing places and explore great opportunities, but we are also working to earn a living; this is just how we chose to do it.

Next time you pass your favourite blogger in the street, please say hi! You’ll never know how much it means to us to meet fans and followers in real life, don’t ever be afraid to approach as we are just like you, don’t ever forget that. Next time you want to tweet or email your favourite blogger, do it – she won’t bite. Treat us as your friends, we are not untouchable and remember, it’s not always as it seems.

Love, a blogger x

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25 Comments

  1. Claudia Grace 1st November 2015 / 4:28 pm

    I love when you do these hart to hart post as it shows the reality of what really goes into blogging which I think is important not to forget! Keep up the good work! x

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:27 pm

      Ah thank you – really glad you enjoy these posts πŸ™‚ x

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:27 pm

      Thank you lovely, I think no matter how big or small our blog, we all feel the same from time to time! x

  2. Eloise 1st November 2015 / 9:38 pm

    Great post! I think it applies to bloggers too, as we're forever comparing ourselves with others xx

  3. Rachel 2nd November 2015 / 10:53 am

    I think people do forget that bloggers and YouTubers are people too. I know Shaaanxo posted a rant video about the way she's treated by 'fans' today and it was awful.

    Rachel | http://www.currentlyrachel.com

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:28 pm

      I completely agree love! Oh really? I'll have to watch – thanks for the heads up πŸ™‚ x

  4. Jackie 2nd November 2015 / 3:07 pm

    This is so good and such a great read. I totally relate and sometimes I think when I'm wearing an a lovely comfy but horrible outfit why I fashion blog or beauty blog. It is so relatable and hope non bloggers can finally see the real side.

    Jackie | fashionxfairytale |

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:28 pm

      So glad to hear you enjoyed the post love πŸ™‚ x

  5. Lauren S 2nd November 2015 / 3:21 pm

    Oh this is such a lovely post Hayley – I completely understand a lot of these points as a blogger too, and if I ever get the chance to meet you I'll make sure to give you that big hug you deserve πŸ™‚

    Lauren x
    Britton Loves | Lifestyle Food Beauty

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:29 pm

      Ah thank you lady! I hope I do get to meet you one day! πŸ™‚ x

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:29 pm

      So glad to hear that Helen, thank you for your lovely post πŸ™‚ x

    • Hayley Rubery 9th November 2015 / 10:29 pm

      Thank you – so glad to hear that πŸ™‚ x

  6. Sophie Harrison 20th November 2015 / 1:21 pm

    This is so true and i do think it's important to remember. But i like how moderate you are here too – while what Essena O'Neill has done is great in many ways, i don't want it to demonise the whole blogging community as so much good comes from it!

    Writing Possibility

  7. Charlotte 21st November 2015 / 5:26 pm

    This is incredible and such that it's addressed in a great way by you!
    Charlotte // charlottespicks.blogspot.com

  8. Frey de Fleur 29th November 2015 / 3:37 pm

    Such a lovely post – sometimes my friends tease me for blogging and I would love them to read this post and know how much time and hard work goes in to each and every tweet, instagram or blog! Beautiful photo for your post as always Hayley x

    http://www.freydefleur.com

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